Noodle Paper #1

Talking to Your Child’s Classmates about
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD)

Ready?

Before you put anything on paper, think about why you want to talk to your child’s class. Possible reasons include:

• changing the perception of classmates about your child’s “odd” behavior and preventing them from attributing incorrect meanings to the behavior;
• preparing peers to act as social skills partners, peer mentors and good will ambassadors;
• building awareness in classmates that will in turn lead to  acceptance of our kids and lay the groundwork for real friendship.

 

Set . . .

Be sure to set the stage at home before talking to others about your child’s autism:

• What are your thoughts and beliefs about your child’s ASD? Are you and your spouse on the same page?
• Have you talked to your child about his or her diagnosis? What does your child believe about ASD? Have you had “the talk” or have you managed to make it an ongoing dialogue?
• How does your child feel about your talking to his or her class? Will he know how to respond when classmates ask him questions after you leave? Don’t “surprise” your child by showing up at school to talk about him.

If your child does not know about his diagnosis or is not comfortable talking about it, you might want to reconsider talking to his class and instead shift your efforts to talking to him. The Catherine Faherty workbook, “Asperger Syndrome: What Does It Mean to Me?” is an excellent resource for you and your child as you explore his inner world. Don’t worry, it’s not just for kids with Asperger’s, but for all kids on the spectrum.

This is a good time to think about your child’s other peers too – siblings.  Older and younger siblings should have their questions answered and their feelings, whether positive or negative, validated. Siblings and their friends can be an excellent source of information about what your child’s classmates may be wondering and thinking. In fact, you might want to use siblings and their friends to do a trial run of your presentation before you take it on the road.

When it comes to supporting siblings, no one can give you better advice than Don Meyer. Check out his books at the Sibling Support Project.

 

Go!

When preparing your presentation, take the following factors into consideration:

• the audience’s age
• the audience’s attention span
• the audience’s experience with your child

Your presentation may include the following topics:

“All About Me” information
In every presentation, include information that kids commonly exchange amongst themselves, like that which is shared in star student presentations. For ideas on creating this sort of profile to share with the class, look at the “All About Me” instant personal poster sets by Scholastic. They’ll get you headed in the right direction.

Same/different and acceptance
For younger classes, explore the concepts of same and different. A great book for this is “Scribbleville” by Peter Holwitz. Emphasize the idea of acceptance of everyone’s differences. Through the “All About Me” information, show that while your child may act differently sometimes there are still a lot of similarities between your child and his classmates.

General ASD information
Don’t overestimate what your audience already knows. They may need to be directly told things that we take for granted:

• You can’t catch autism from someone else
• Kids with autism can learn
• Autism makes it harder for your child to play but he does want friends
• Your child with autism learns from the kids around him

Specifics on your child’s ASD
Explain the reasons why your child does the things he does. For example, a child who hits other kids may be looking for their attention, but isn’t able to use his words to get it. A child who sits alone at lunch may not feel that it’s okay to join others OR may really need that time to decompress and want to be alone. It’s your job to help classmates translate what they see.

Awareness exercises
Older classes may benefit from some autism awareness exercises. You can find great ideas in “Walk Awhile in My Autism” by Kate McGinnity and Nan Negri.  Additionally, there are some online exercises available at All Kinds of Minds

For more resources, refer to the ‘Introducing Your Child’
Web resources list
Awareness books list

For more perspective on parenting children with autism, check out our blog “The Cheese Stands Alone”

© 2008 Mac 'n' Cheese